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Anyone regrets NOT having surgery early?
Main Archives Page2004
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Anyone regrets NOT having surgery early?
Aug. 29th, 2004 6:18pm
Are there any adult CAHers who didn’t have surgery as a child because they were left to make their own decision when they were older, and who later decided to have surgery but wished they had it done as a baby/child? Are there anyone who wished the choice was chosen by their parents so that they didn’t have to make that decision themselves when they were older? I know it’s not the same thing....but my sister has quite a large dark mole on her face which she wishes was removed when she was a baby so that she didn’t have to put up with stares and questioning from curious people. She always said it would have been best to have it removed when she was tiny so she wasn’t aware of it or remember any of the surgery. We chose to have surgery for my SWCAH daughter when she was 19 mths old. I have to admit this was more for cosmetic reasons because we didn’t want her to feel she was "different". I think knowing what my sister went through and what her wishes were (that is, a choice that was made for her before she was old enough to be aware), had something to do with our decision too. We didn’t want our child to say to us "why didn’t you sort it out when I was younger so I won’t be called names?". There are times (especially when I read about comments from people who are anti-surgery) which make me feel guilty and make me wonder if I have done the right thing for her. At the time, we weren’t given an option to have surgery or not. We just went along with it. I just hope and pray this hasn’t affected her future sexual sensations. It’s hard to know what to do for the best sometimes. Would she blame us if she didn’t have any sensation? Probably, if she couldn’t orgasm. If we didn’t do surgery, would she blame us for not choosing surgery for her when she was a baby? Probably, if she got bullied and teased at school. All I can say is, we made a decision as parents because we wanted what we felt was the best for our child. I just hope that decision was the correct one.
Jo
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