Bonnie, I'm so incredibly sorry for your loss. As far as your mom being a carrier, she didn't have to be. One of your parents could be a carrier and therefore passed the gene onto you. I know you are grasping...and I know what you are going through. I lost my mom 4 years ago this month, suddenly to a massive heart attack. She was never ever even sick and one morning she suffered a massive heart attack and died right in her living room floor. She was my best friend, and she cared so much for my kids, that it was like she was their mom. I needed her so much this past week, to support me during Amanda's surgery, so this was a mentally painful week for me that way. If you need to talk about anything, please feel free to email me...my email is Eibhlinron@aol.com. It helps to talk to someone who knows where you are coming from. I will be more than happy to talk about any feelings that you have. I know I searched high and low in my heart for some rhyme or reason for my mothers passing. Take one day at a time. My deepest sympathy, Eileen