Thanks to all who have written with advice and support. I guess I am on somewhat of the right track since I am trying all of the things you all have suggested. Sometimes it just doesn't seem like enough. I do thank God everyday for my son (we tried a long time to have him and I didn't think he would ever come). I really am glad to have found some place that I could share my feelings with people who truly understand. My family is a HUGE help but I think it is hard for them to deal with all of this too. I worry sometimes that I am "complaining" to them too much after all they have their own lives to so I thank you all for your offers to e-mail and vent if necessary. I really think you all will be a Godsend!