Joan, you always could see through all the bull**** and get right to the point. That's one of the things I like best about you. I was up all night last night with Ryan massaging his knuckles and wrists. He was screaming with pain. I think that it is not really that I am afraid to send him to school, but rather I am reliving the liquid cortef nightmare because of the symptoms Ryan is now exhibiting. I now know that they mean something and this time, no doctor can tell me otherwise. My daughter had growing pains. I know what they are. These are not the normal ones. Joan, I think you are right that the hormones are probably at work and he may need an adjustment. I will be calling Dr. New in the a.m. I think that this is just a bit of transferrence on my part. I think that, in my son's case, it would be a bad idea to keep him home. He loves to make new friends and work together in a big group of people. Those of you who met him at the conference can attest to that. He really comes to life when he meets new children. When pre-school closed for the summer he was always asking me when could he see his friends again. He can't wait to get on the bus and go to school like his sister. Also, our children do need to develop their own ammune systems. They need to be exposed to germs and things so that they can fight it off on their own. I think that that and the flu shot is what kept my son alive throughout the year that he was grossly undersuppressed. We were surrounded by people who were sick with one thing or another or just getting over something and Ryan got just one cold last year that lasted three days. Even I had it longer! Tomorrow will be a difficult day I know. There will be tears (on my part) and fears but we will get through it. I know I will feel better when we find out what is causing this pain. Until then I will probably continue to walk around with a knot in my stomach and a lump in my throat. I am a classroom volunteer and will also be a bus parent for the last two days of next week. After we have a couple of weeks under our belt I am sure this terror will go away. I need to learn to trust again. It's hard, but I will do it. After all, what is the alternative? God will see me through this. I have prayed to him to help me learn to trust again and I think this is his answer. I will keep you posted as more of you begin to put your precious cargo on the bus over the next few weeks. Thank you all for your words of encouragement and suggestions. They are greatly appreciated. Have a great day.