I understand your frustration and confusion completely.  My daughter Claire also wrestled with a body image problem caused by comments from others.  At 5 years, your daughter is old enough to understand that people are judging her appearance in a negative way.  We always tried to stress eating heart-healthy instead of talking about low fat (which makes fat sound like the enemy), and we stressed the importance of appreciating individual differences without making judgements.  If it's any consolation, I believe Claire is more accepting of differences in others' appearances since she has been on the receiving end of nasty comments herself.

When I had finally had enough, I called her doc not to ask that Claire's dose be decreased, but to tell her I was doing it.  She surprised me by agreeing it was worth a try, but I could tell she thought I was wrong.  She asked me to keep a diet and exercise log to see if we could see any problems there.  The weight dropped off so fast, she forgot all about the log.  We continue to stress eating only when hungry and only until satisfied, but her hunger has decreased to a point that food just isn't important to her anymore.  It might be worthwhile to log your daughter's diet and exercise for a bit to show to your doc. 

Is your daughter using any Florinef?  My girls are LOCAH, but even mild cases can benefit from a small dose of Florinef.  My older daughter used it for a while when her height was being suppressed by the Cortef.  We decreased her Cortef a bit and added Florinef.  Her linear growth improved and she stayed under good control. 

You said that her blood levels never come back right.  What exactly are the numbers?  Different endos have different ideas of what right means, but it is never going to be what is right for unaffected children.  If your daughter's levels were "normal", she would be very oversuppressed.  If you'll post some of her recent results, I'm sure you'll get lots of feedback from the knowledgeable parents on this board.

I'm not advocating a complete disregard for your doctor's opinions, but you know your child better than anyone.  If you stand strong as an advocate for optimal treatment (not just good enough - but great), I hope your doctor will work with you. 

A 5 year old who isn't growing is not right.  Please continue to ask your doctor for answers, and if he doesn't have them, find another doctor!