It is good to use the endo as a point person in CAH treatment, but it is also important to realize that the endo is a medical person, and not a counselor or therapist.

The endo's main concerns are numbers.  As long as levels are good, the endo will feel his or her job is done.  They are not trained nor will concern themselves on the well-being of the whole body.  That is where a therapist or counselor needs to be addressed.  You can have a body that is well-controlled through the use of drugs, but with associated emotions spinning out of control

I don't think it is reasonable to expect the endo to tend to those needs.  That is the role a qualified therapist needs to fill.  The issues of gender and being different that will likely arise when your child is discovering her sexual being and self need to be attended to by a qualified person, and unfortunately the scientists that look at 17 OH numbers are not in that group.