Kaye,

It is not a negative reflection on one's character to seek psychological help in dealing with CAH.  If my parents had perhaps I wouldn't be in therapy today.

If you truly are open minded about this there are a number of  research papers recently published that confirm that genital surgery on infants often causes damage and that vaginal surgeries have to be repeated when the girl is older.

I would be glad to give you some citations and can also refer you to endocrinologists and surgeons who oppose such surgery.

Joan