Kathryn,

If you are going to have a discussion at all about something on a message board, there are always going to be diverse opinions about anything.  That is what a message board is about.  Read comments above.  Having a different opinion and giving it is not being mean spirited.  I am sorry that you perceive it that way.  It is no one fault that they feel differently.  But it is our responsibility to "all" contribute and say how we feel, so that parents who have to contemplate such have all the reasonings there for both options.  I was polite in my posts.  Never made any direct comments that were offensive.  My posts were factual and derived from constructive information that is freely available.  I Involve myself in a "Support group" and we all help with these issues and give our thoughts.  I have no idea why Kaye perceived that whole thread to be directed at her personally.  For the most part, with the exception a one or two direct questionings, the most of my comments were put there for the benefit and support of all parents who have that decision---not just Kaye.. For Kaye the isues just happen to be happening now as she approaches surgery.   She knows what she wants to do, and no one wants to make the decision any more difficult.  However, the topic was clearly brought up and everyone has a right to contribute and give differences of opinion to create a balance here. 

I have had it all the last few days, but "Mean Spirited" just about tops it all on top of the fact that everything that I posted in that thread was valid and educated. 

Thanks Kathryn

JH