Dear Betsy, I hear your words. Perhaps it is time to walk away now. How does the saying go? You can take a horse to water, but you cannot make it drink? What I mean to say here is, all that women can do is put facts where they are needed. It is down to the child’s parents after that. I have known this for some time. You refer in your post to another anonymous. I say here that that would be me from the first post onwards. I credit you with all the work that you girls are doing at the moment. However, Public forums are not for me. I value my privacy far too much. My feelings and sentiments on these issues though are pretty much the same. It was not my intention here to make parents angry on this message board (choosing my words carefully here). Why any parent would feel the need to go out and choose surgery from something that I did or said would be beyond me, I have already made it clear in my posts how I feel about it. However, someone always end’s up being angry in these situations (I say angry in replacement to the po term used here) I am sure that parent’s would much rather that they have everything before them now, including any anger that may be inevitable when taking these decisions, than make a decision and have their children angry much later, and mainly with them. Young women who had surgeries in the past decade are now angry with their doctors, as they believe that their parents were ignorant about certain issues. However, facts are all around us now, so the anger is going to be on parents from hence, when all these issues had been put out there for them before they decide. How do you balance what is best here? Anger now on a message board, or later with family rifts and anger directed at parents for doing these things in the face of clear facts? I thank you for your input. Much of what you said in your posts the last few days has moved me greatly. Like you, I always was taught that if you deal a personal salvo, you should realize that it automatically invites or invokes a response. Some people do this and some people don’t. I do. I admire the fact that you are in the public forum and right where it counts and your pluck and courage. I have to say, the post to Kaye was particularly moving by the first anonymous. I don’t think for one minute here that her pain is what drives her to educate parents. Some parents may comfort themselves with this, but I feel the vast majority of people out there value these things on the web and on a message board. Carry on your crusade! It takes a great deal of perseverance, and it is not to say that I have none, I just value my privacy. I may e-mail you sometime to discuss in more depth and thank you for making such available to me. Regards Anon To All Questions where asked in the midst of all that “ugliness” and in asking questions, one must expect that somewhere someone will put down some answers. They may not be always what you ant to hear or what you feel is right. Going on from there, in order to discount everything I have said, or anyone else opposed to surgery and posting anonymously here for that matter, some parent’s drew reference to the anonymity and make it seem like half the information was invalid. The information is out there for all to investigate. Children will pull records and investigate when they become adults. Ask questions, and disagree with decisions made as babies. In posting anonymously, it does nothing to depreciate from the facts. Parent’s and Children, not just CAH children, have a right to privacy online or off. If some parent’s choose to respect that, or adults value their online privacy and privacy in life then that is their right. Giving people information voluntarily is not necessary in communicating with people on line and helping others or giving other’s advice and sharing views or beliefs or facts. Parents that have to contemplate everything before they make decisions about genital surgery don’t have to have the information before hand, but it helps and this is available on line now. Was not 10 to 20 years ago to most recently. Some people choose to put a name to facts and other’s do not. Let’s be blunt here, it must be very hard to even put your thoughts on to a post in this position, let alone let everyone know about your personal well being and your life. Betsy does as do others, but some, although they feel the same way and know the same facts have rights to their privacy. Especially where this is concerned! It does not make anything that they have to say invalid. Surgery has been experimental for years and still is and many parents went along with what their doctors said or chose to have these done in ignorance for the most part. Some may not have. The difference right now is, there is more information out there. So if this generation of women are affected by all this and questioning this, how will the babies of today feel when all this was known about, and still surgeries were performed for appearances sake? That is the last I have to say. Anon