I find it so interesting to watch my daughter and see what she enjoys playing with. She loves dare devil activity like jumping from the couch onto a beanbag and climbing up everything. So do my husband and myself! (We rock climb, back pack, ski etc.) She loves zooming her cars around and also dressing up her stuffed animals. When I change her diaper she pushes her stomach out really far and says "Baby" while patting her tummy. She comes and tells me her baby went pee pee and then we get a wipe for her to clean her baby! She's just so precious. My girlfriend is pregnant and there are two newborns on our block so she's been surrounded by the whole experience! I just think it's interesting because I was always a Tom boy myself, growing up with my big brother as my mentor! To me, she's just so normal and natural experiencing it all! (I think it would drive me a little batty having a very girly girl like my neice!! She's 3 1/2 going on 15, yikes! Anyway, I'm just so very full of love for her! I do worry about her happiness and health in the future. She is going to be our only child, CAH playing a big part in the decision. Not that I believe it's a "bad" life because I don't. But the stress on me has been extreme with worry. I am an easy going person by nature, who just went with the flow so to speak. Not causing waves and trusting in the world. Now, I find it so very hard to relax. I just worry constantly. And no longer believe, "That can't happen to me." I got shingles, which you can get if you've ever had chicken pox. The virus lays dormant in your nervous system and if you get stressed it comes out as very extremely painfuls shingles rash. It's contagious and I gave chicken pox to my daughter when she was just 3 months old! UGH! I try to do yoga and exercise but a working mother finds little time for herself. (I work part time and my husband stays home with her.) I used to want to travel to other countries with her and now the thought fills me with dread and I get a lump in my throat. I know logically that I can be prepared but sometimes I just think why risk it? ANyone have any advice on how to get over this general fear of my daughter dying? I'm thinking of going to a counselor as the weight of all this is just so heavy sometimes. My husband is a wonderful father but the reality is I do the researching, questioning, medicating etc. And if I'm not home to medicate I always have to check and make sure he gave it to her. Just felt like getting a load off to those who know. Thanks.