Jessica, I am so glad that you vented your anger with us and not your Mom! Believe me..... there WILL be a day when your issues of  cancer and cah will be of no importance. There will be a time that you will want or crave your Mothers presence and memories. The memories will not be over your support of any cause other than the fact that you are MOTHER and DAUGHTER. Keep in mind that she is older and in her days things like this just DID NOT HAPPEN and everything from Downs syndrome to  sexual abuse was kept in the closet and if some of the family EVEN suggested anything was out of the ordinary........ they were shunned or excluded from family gatherings. We are the lucky generation that we discuss everything from our childrens puberty to why they drink red koolaid instead of grape. The older generation is just not made that way and chances are she won’t change. In her heart she knows what she should be doing and will be your support........ her FEAR of the unknown is holding her back from moving forward. Not saying she is right .... she is just who she is and sometimes we just have to accept them that way! Geez... do you REALLY think her anger is over you not wearing a yellow bracelet. I think her anger is FEAR in not knowing if she will have your support through the cancer. I would buy some yellow ribbon tie it around my wrist and tell her you are continuing to look for the bracelet. Tell her when you find one you will wear it in her honor and you would like for her to wear a CAH (when it is invented) one for her Granddaughter as her illness is life threatening as well. As far as you being involved with Cares and this board tell her this is your life line to knowledge for your daughter and you will continue to use it and enrich your life with education. Confront her with HER fears that you will be there for her as I think this is her issue .  I am a Grandmother and I will tell you there is NOTHING I won’t do to help my baby and if someone wants to be nosy about her genitalia........... so be it! This is as much of a part of CAH as a masectomy is to breast cancer. The key words here are to communicate and educate and keep your heart and family intact. Your daughter will need all of you and your support.  Sincerely Cherry