Dear Diana,

How are you? You hold a special place for me because of the adoption part. We really are chosen and that is very special. Nope, haven’t gotten Carol’s Book yet - Hurricane Wilma disrupted many things But even still always could of been worse.

I should of wrote how do they keep the surgical site open these days because I know how they did it in my day because I was on the receiving end of residents? surgeon? just men and women dialating me with their fingers.

I still recall the gold ties with the blue poka dots. It’s horrific to have that done to you as a child and young teen. Your parents are so pleased it was done to you and the doctors smiling over you as they voilate  ..keep the man made canal open.

Good girl slide down on my finger --- parents want this done ---doctor does too everyone happy it looks good and mine did also for the era. If I could just say one thing is to give them knock out drugs every time they have to endure the dialators or the fingers. I talked with the surgeon years later and he really thinks finger dialations are less of a trauma.

Surgery isn’t going to stop for someone like me ..really and whatever parents do is what they do and it needs to go past all this controversy crap to the realization that some will decide early surgery for their kid and be happy and some will wait a bit or even longer.

It just needs to be called different treatment options and what I was wondering is that are they able to not have dialations at all from some girls because of advancement in surgical technique? because I read on the Cornell site still about the use of dilators.

Even with dialation, I ’ve had trouble with vaginal stenosis and had surgery in my 20’s for that and without regular use of the area - it shrinks up ...closes on its own.

I enjoy medical history and love how far CAH has come.

You’all thrill with the appearance and I can get in your shoes and understand but your kids went through so much to become acceptable and I hope you all take that into account.

Another thing is that yes you are all happy with the way externally your daughter looks but please give her that extra support about women ..We fit socially very well with guys and men - what a difference that is ...I should say I and the women that I talk with that have CAH but don’t post but fitting in with women? A mystery to me ! Yes we are women Yes the surgery is only fixing what the slacker of the adrenal gland did but I thought it was only me that didn’t connect with other women -- I would of liked to of had with other women because I know it is to late the same type of relationship ..conversations that come without effort talking with men. People say I’m cute ...once I was wearing muddy work boots, dirty jeans covered in grease, a sweaty t-shirt, baseball cap, no make up and short hair and this guy goes you’re pretty.

Don’t know if it is the excessive androgens, just me or the fact of the surgery, genital exams and having to endure being measured during puberty- what 11 year old gets a man not much older than she is measuring budding breasts with a ruler? his tie was red and he had black hair and glasses - most girls are mortified about boys snapping training bras but girls with CAH at least back in the day. We get- spread those legs darling -We are so happy about what we did. You lie there and assume the frog leg position.

 

Dear Jess,

It is good that you went to Doctor Rick and your daughter surgery will help the next child in the link.