yeah wanted to add tried to kill myself twice but for some reason ..some force inside turned my head to the side and didn’t choke on all that vomit. Get your thyroid checked, something called DHEA errr that is close for the letters and also find out about celiac sprue   because that can make one feel like c### too .

I’ll never be a really thin woman but I’ve found that men like a little meat on the bones - It’s a family board  so I’ll stop there. Sooo - you have this 100 pound focus when in reality you might only need to lose 70 or 80

What about painting as a form of expression to work thru feeling so blue? find classes at the local community college or library.

OK...... look I can’t kill myself so neather can you ..got it? 

You lost 25 pounds - congradulations ! how did you do that? must of been more than a cortisone switch?

Not going to kill myself ...Jamacia is a $99 boat trip away.

Write down at least one thing you like about yourself and go from there.

I make people laugh and smile even though I don’t mean to - that is something right there that has nothing to do with how fat i am. I’m funny without trying and that is some sort of gift ...you have a gift also and if you kill yourself then you’re being selfish not sharing it. I’ve been selfish and it doesn’t feel very good.