"At 11 my mother and doctors thought I thought nothing of a physical exam either."
This kind of makes the point from my first post. You can't compare my daughter to yourself for some very obvious reasons.
1. She isn't you. (This about says it all, no two people will deal with the same thing in the same way.)
2. Her medical problems aren't exactly the same as yours.
3. The medical community she is dealing with is in a different time period than when you were her age.
"This is something that shoundn't be done period as it destroys violates being a kid/tween. Think about it. We are children and people in their 20's get uncomfortable but we are made to go through it before our minds are mature"
I didn't know this procedure (to have her vaginal opening checked before puberty) was a choice. Her urologist and endo both have informed me this is an important thing to do, as forced blood flow, or clots that are unable pass, could cause irreversible damage. I noticed you told someone on the main board this doesn't need to be done. That is why I think it important to recognize the differences between every case. I think for some it is very important.
As a late bloomer myself, I hope she doesn't start her cycle for awhile, but when I was around her age, girls typically started their periods when they were 12-16. The average age now is 9-13. Are their minds ready? Maybe not, but it is coming, and as her mother I have to do everything to prepare her.
"....and this my kid is mature please get real ."
Don't believe I have ever said that, but for the record, I don't think she is more mature than most kids her age about most things. She never cleans her room without being asked, I have to nag her all the time about chores and homework, and I still can't trust her to go to sleepovers unless I REALLY know the parents because she probably won't take her meds. I do think my dialogue and openess, however, about her condition and my own anatomy does make her comfortable with her body. Actually, she says she is looking forward to the upcoming procedure because she has always wondered what it felt like to "be put to sleep."
"Kids want to please their parents and the men/women in white coats. Feelings come out later in many ways."
I wish my kid was a "parent pleaser," but she isn't. You should see her report card! She tells me things she doesn't like about school, friends, her dad, her brothers, me, and yes, even things she doesn't like about CAH. White coats are never mentioned, but I don't believe she has ever seen a doctor in a white coat.
All people have feelings come out, especially during their teen years. This is normal and I'm sure it will happen. It is my job to make sure she doesn't dwell on things that can't be changed. When I was a teen I was convinced my dad didn't love me. I could have held unto that forever and convinced other people that their dads didn't love them too. My mom made sure this didn't happen, and I moved on.
"Shield the child? all of you are preping us to have kids."
I'm not sure what this means.
"Aimee being used again and word taken to serve others needs. "
I don't use your name to serve my purposes. I don't have an agenda here. Just a story and things to think about, like you. I do use it to reference your comments. If you would prefer I didn't, I won't. I also wanted to make the point that I have learned a great deal from your comments, however, I have to wade through what actually applies to my daughter's life now. I hope everyone else will do the same. As always, nice talking with you!
God Bless,
Katrina
