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I'm sorry that you are under the idea that a large clitoris is a penis.
I'm sorry that your parents never shared what was done to you.
In my opinion, Besty must be an eye opener for you because in my opinion she voiced open communication, truth about the side effects like the vaginal stenosis that you seem to be dealing with alone and she streesed the idea that in many cases that surgery such as this can wait until the person that owns the body decides.
Best Wishes
#disclamier# This isn't meant for medical advice but is just one person with CAH Opinion.