Hi Sara,
I'm 34 and also have SWCAH. I understand how you feel about being "sir"ed more than "ma'am"ed. I've spent years explaining to friends and in-laws what CAH is...just to have them shrug and say "whatever."
I've been depressed, gone on wicked drinking binges.
I've gone off my meds...just to see what would happen. I don't recommend that anyone do that. Bad idea.
I'm not a regular poster on this forum, but I happened to see your post, you're not alone, I know how you feel.